The problem comes when we find ourselves in a relationship and we are constantly comparing our partners with this conjured-up ‘perfect’ person. When that happens, we stop appreciating our partner for all the beautiful qualities they do possess.The truth is this perfect person does not exist. More importantly, we may not actually need all of these qualities in a partner to be extraordinarily happy.Now describe what they are like: their personality, their appearance, what they do, what they like and don’t like, and so on. Put the list away for a while. Come back to the list and imagine what it would be like living with this person for 20+ years. Ask yourself questions such as the following:
Will their good looks fade? The better question is “when” not “if.”

Would that personality trait you liked such as a strong, dominant become overbearing?

How long would it be before that “free spirit” you enjoy now appear to be irresponsible?

What will you do when you change and grow? What will happen to the relationship?

Are your principles and values being satisfied with this person in the long term?

Why would my relationship with someone like this last for a lifetime?

Now rewrite your list of characteristics and create a new description.